May 19 2010

I had a personal conversation with a friend recently. You know, the “My life is this. For me its always….” kind of conversation. And I realize something for myself. So I think I should write down here to share, also to not forget it.

What I’ve realized don’t base on the content of the conversation, but by the nature of the conversation.

I think after all these kinds of conversation, besides the “learn more about the other person” factor, the feeling of having had a personal conversation before also helps u more confident in your friendship with the other person. Although the former involves a little bit of thinking and some people might not be able to do it, the latter comes naturally without you noticing it.

Somewhere in the conversation I started to feel lost, because there are more information being flown than that my brain can process. So how do you overcome that? When listening to others, try to formulate your own thoughts rather than following her words. Whenever you feel you need to listen to her point, do so. Whenever you feel you got her point but she moved on explaining by stating examples, dont stop her. Rather, branch off your thought and spend these little time gaps to collect all the information you’ve heard to grab the big picture of the conversation, the topic you’re talking about, as well as the other person. When she finishes her point, you are good to go, either move on by speak up your own point, or use your formulated thoughts to give comments to her point.

Also, sometime into the conversation, I feel like I am not learning anything new. Information kept being flown around but it’s just the same old tree, just different branches or in different seasons. I, well, haven’t figured out a way how to overcome this. Share with me if you know.


3 responses so far

  1. Hey, it’s because she’s a girl?

  2. For the first point? hmm that could play a factor here. But I’d say it is very small. More likely it depends on the nature of the conversation.

  3. I think talking to a smart vietnamese girl always leads to such complicated kind of conversation.

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