Some random thoughts coming up here and there:
Health and relationships are the 2 most important things that can keep you happy. Unlike skillsets or knowledge, where you start from zero and start putting efforts to build it up, health and relationship you sort of natraully get it over time through life and growing up. And the maintainance part becomes the primary job.
Maintainance is hard. Because there’s no urgency. And it’s not as exciting as building (or gaining) new stuff/knowledge. Think of a security guard’s job. As compared to a construction worker’s job.
I sort of come to this point of my life without any serious hard decision, molding from my very own conscious. It’s all very natural every decision I’ve made so far. There’s no clear, major “If you choose to do this you’re gonna trade off that”. That’s something really scary to me.
Even thought about going back home to stay with grandma for a while. Why would something like that always cause me some resistance?
I’ve been really growing at home and at work within my level of comfort zone. There isn’t much moments where the fear is real, the heart is beating heart, the fear of rejection, or public judgement. This may sound stupid, but it really took me courages to step up to ask a question in public talk, or knocking on neighbor’s door to ask for some ingredients.
Should try doing something that you’re completely uncomfortable with: sales, public speaking.